Mad for AIT

TONIGHT, as I was taking my post dinner walk, I thought suddenly; I am absolutely crazy in AIT. It's a thought that often crosses my mind. Someone or something is always going loopy, and quite often it's me.

Like, I was trying to score good marks for the last 4 years, but poor me, could never score above 55%. The result comes and I feel sad just for a moment and with that sad-facing I am heading to Mayur. I have been here for the past 4 years, and we call it "home away from home". It is a strange beast, this AIT. It hugs me, so tightly sometimes that I can't breathe, then it turns and punches me hard in the face, leaving me stunned. Then it hugs me again, and suddenly I know everything will be all right.

It was my choice to come - I always wanted a career in engineering and AIT was the only college where I could get Computers - and I wanted a change. I needed something new, exciting, thrilling, terrifying. And AIT gave that to me in spades. To outsiders, AIT has a particular kind of impression. We are approached like "You are in AIT? My God, really !!! Subah PT hoti hai kya? And do they teach you how to fire guns?" I thought, who in AIT would bother to get up from his/her bed to go for PT or pick guns to fire them. AITans don't know much, but can give you an answer for anything you ask. Who would know better than me? I being a PR have seen inventions of new languages in that 15 minutes of technical interview. Others have searched and sorted like none could do before. Mechanical people make it through software companies more easily where Compies find it difficult to crack. Being in AIT is like being in a very intense, extremely dysfunctional relationship. AIT and I fight, we scream, we argue, we don't speak for days on end, but really, deep down, we love each other.

AIT wonders why I don't just "know" how things are done, why I argue with it about everything, why I judge, why I rail at injustice and then do nothing about it. But at the same time, it has taught me things. It has taught me to be brave, bold, independent, sometimes even fierce and terrifying. It has taught me to walk in another man's chappals, and ask questions a different way when at first the answer is no. It has taught me to accept the things I cannot change. It has taught me that there are always, always, two sides to every argument. And it is kind enough to let me come and stay.

AIT didn't make my stay easy though (but then, why should it?). It does not allow me to drink peacefully and not even in a corner of it (volleyball court). What costs you 100 rupees one day might be 200 rupees the next, I am talking about the fine that is imposed per day in case you get late, plus that extra effort to go to the Bank. What you didn't need to bring yesterday, you suddenly need to bring today and no one would tell you why. The registrar can ask you to come back tomorrow and see him again just because he is too busy on phone or chatting with other staff members. He will never answer to your queries (even when a simple 'yes' or 'no' would do the trick) but will give you a lecture for 5 minutes and then ask you to notice the notice board. Notice boards are also a funny thing in AIT, some change hourly (registrar), others change yearly (mag board).

It's not easy being here, although I am spoiled. I abuse, I drink, I smoke. I have long, boozy brunches in restaurants and not to mention, I prepare for it (skip a couple of meals prior to it). I have very little to complain about. But then I have been ragged, stripped, made to propose, sometimes compose too, fill bottles, do assignments sometimes my own and sometimes that of others, teased, given less term work and been made fun countless times. I have lived more than I have ever in my life, out of frustration, happiness, anger, loneliness, excitement and the sheer hugeness of being here. The longer I stay, the more I seem to relax.

But I do often wonder why I'm here, especially when I'm tired and homesick. I am technically zero, I have a job that I don't deserve, I have an aggregate equivalent to what has compelled so many IITans to hang themselves. But then a willing ride always comes along, and I'll turn a corner and be suddenly in the midst of some banging, online gaming, outdoor sports and crashing mad parties, where everyone is talking to someone specific in 'English' about someone 'specific' and reciting, when 'she' first smiled at him, and I breathe out and think, really, my God, this is fantastic. This is AIT! I live in AIT! It hugs me, it punches me, and it hugs me again.

Yet I know after a while I won't ever belong here. It will hurt and will stay within me forever. I will remember when my friends gave suggestions like: "Lets go to the graveyard. Time....ahhhh...its 2 am." Some eatable when falls of his hand, he'll eat it, beacause he knows that he won't die. I feel proud to be called an AITan because being a true AITan is in my DNA. I marvel at how incredibly good scorers, many of them are (up to 90 plus in both board exams), they start at 45 in first sem here and improve it to a mere 50 by the last sem. There are hundreds here who speak 3 languages. We have Gultis, Mallus, Biharis, Jats, Nepalis and god knows everything that you can think of. We fit ourselves so easily, be it a train or a bike.

I've done things of which I am ashamed, things I never thought I would do. I am sorry since mentioning them might get me and my friends into deep trouble. Let secrets be secrets. I am kind and I am cold-hearted, I am fair and I am mean, I am delightful and I am downright rude. I am all of these at once and I distress myself wildly over it, but somehow, AIT accepts me. It has time for everyone, you don't need to fight here for survival; it will just shove everyone along a bit and make room for you. It just keeps moving along.

And then, theist or atheist, but you go to temple. Don't know whom do you pray for, but yes an AITan can love more than anyone else. He thinks of his friend, sides his meanness and does justice to every relationship he is asked to, be it fanticism or friendship.

In short, I have been among the luckiest of the lucky. It keeps me on my toes, AIT, and I have been blessed that you let me stay for a while. Thank God, it was a while, because at a stage, it was asking me to extend my trip for 5 years. It wanted me to succeed here and it gave me grand opportunities and endless second chances. It willed me forward like a stern parent. It welcomed me. And when I leave, because I know I will one day, I will weep, because I will miss it terribly. And because I know it won't even notice that I am gone.

Welcome 2011

Time has passed by so quickly. It's been eons since I updated this blog. It's not that I was busy, but rather I did not have the urge or passion to write. I know the title of this blog post seems quite absurd, "Welcome 2011", but don't you think that its never too late to welcome anything that you expect to turn fruitful for you.

The year 2010 was an eventful one with its own share of ups and downs. The past year redefined my life for all the right reasons. In my college life, I faced a lot of challenges that nearly threatened to make me give up and quit. I made a lot of mistakes which I never would have imagined. As they say, “When things go wrong, they do so at the most inopportune moment”. Guess I have to get used to the fact that I will make mistakes on and off.

On the positive side, 2010 gave me many reasons to smile. I got through all of my backlogs when it was least expected. I happened to get one of the most lucrative offers offered by IT industry in AIT. Then of course, there was this girl, who could not resist falling in love with me, or you could call it other way round too. I succeeded in many, and failed in some. As they say, “Behind every successful man there are many unsuccessful years”. And in fact, 2009 wasn't good at all. The best part of 2010 came when I realized that I had grown old, old enough to realize my mistakes and learn from them. Bye bye 2010. Thanks for the good and not so good memories. I cherish them all.

2011 has started with a bang. I got my job offer, for which I would like to thank Bhuvanesh Yadav [Helped me to get through the first obstacle], Nikant Ahlawat [kept me alarmed], Prince Mishra [my mentor], Chetan Sood [iska naam arbit hai], Krishna [helping me go techie], Raju & Shekhu [for providing me this opportunity] and all others whose names have been missed out.

On the personal end, I had made up my mind for a new bike, but finally time constraint put by Sapient and Bajaj both, hindered me from buying one. It would have been the sexiest among sexy, Bajaj Avenger 220 cc and that too Midnight Black. I would have preffered to call it KAALIYA. Hope whenever KAALIYA comes, it helps me reach the road to prosperity.

Life at College is just going ok. Looking forward to a great year ahead, second half of which will be spent at Sapient with some of the most awesome people from college. God! Pray that I get increment in my salary this year and that too twice, plus I clear my CAT with 100 percentile [more importantly 100 percentiles in all three sections], and get some 10 to 12 girlfriends more by the end of this year. Bas itna sa khwab hai.

To add to my college concerns, I need to get a passport and a pan card and among them the most important being to clean up the mess i made up with my first semester exams and perform well in the coming exam, so as to get at least 60% in final year. Pray that I study well.

I've got an interesting year ahead of me. Although I am not sure what is in store, I am confident that this year will see me reach some very important milestones in life. Til then, See ya. :)

I wonder if I am in Love

When can you confirm, that you are in love

When you see her face in your book

Or when you repeatedly check facebook

When you fall in love with the sound of her voice

Or when she seems to be the ultimate choice

When you smile remembering the good old days

Or when you think, you are left with nothing to chase

When you have to gather courage to say the "word"

Or when talking to her, you forget the world

When you start sharing everything with her

Or when you forget to call your brother but not her

When an extrovert guy starts feeling shy

Or when slightest idea of her parting away can make you cry

When you take care of everything you speak

Or when you can’t find anything more sweet

When she talks to you in a shy-low voice
Or when she ignores her friends for you, by choice

Or when you turn into a poet, the most daunting task

Someone rightly said about poem, it’s the feel that brings line

And probably today I set them fine

I wonder if these are the symptoms

I wonder if I am in love?
I wonder if I am in love?

and then I fell in what they call LOVE

Note: This is for anyone who has been in a one-sided love affair. If you have pined over someone, idealized them to the point you question your own worth and felt continuously disappointed by the affection you have not received...this blog post is for you.

My blog “the THIRD eYe” is getting older day by day, and as it gets older, it’s getting cooler. Sounds nice, when people complement you that way. I took up blogging as a hobby, thanks to some wonderful seniors I have been with. Now, I encourage others to take up blogging as a hobby and exercise it regularly. People now value my opinion and often come to me with doubts of different sorts. Believe me, it feels very nice when you come back to your room in the evening, and you are completely tired and when you check for the “Stats”, and there are visitors from all over the map. The “Stats” also provides the administrator with some interesting facts about the blog, like the audience source, most read post and the traffic source. “Farmville” is an all-time hit, the most read post, but there is convincing number of hits on other posts too. Getting complements from people encourages you to write more and more. It feels very nice when people value your suggestions and take it as a word of advice. One of them, an aspiring blogger asked, “What do I write on my blog?” I answered, “Write what you feel”. Yes, and that’s the truth, one of my friends, my old roommate has flooded his blog, either with technical posts or posts on “love”. This is because he is either on phone, talking to one of his many so called “just friends” or he is busy with his routine technical stuff. Today his blog is one of the most read, he lives life like a “Prince”.

Recently, I came into contact with one of my schoolmate. I have been talking to her a bit more than I do to others. So, people around me in hostel and on Internet, have become quite suspicious of me. Since, I had discussed the same with some of my friends, hence one of them asked me to write a blog post on “love”. I told him that I could not do so, since I love writing on topics I pursue interest in or have acumen for. Since, I have never fallen in love so writing on such an abstract topic would be impossible for me. And truly speaking, the topic seems to be limited, I mean you don’t have much to write. You will probably agree on the same view, until you have seen my dear friend Dexter's blog. He has written some 6 or 7 posts on love. It’s not like that I haven’t tried it yet, but it’s been difficult for me to write even two paragraphs. On the other hand, he has been writing versions of the same post, “An open Declaration of love”. I wonder how he finds description in there. I simply can’t, but sooner or later a time comes, when you start feeling it. Dear reader, don’t get excited and keep reading and don’t ever ping me or comment below the post, asking her name. Mind it!!! By the way, you will do justice to the post if you consider my affair to be absolutely one-sided.